Swifty meals.

A few thoughts on fast food...

1. I'd like to have a word with the people at McDonald's who let the word "nuggnut" enter the lexicon. First of all, for this to have happened, somebody had to brainstorm it from their advertising team. Then they had to present it to McDonald's executives as a good idea to build a campaign around. Then it was tested through multiple focus groups and passed with flying colors. Then commercials were written and filmed, Web sites conceptualized, written and constructed. AROUND A WORD AS GODDAMN GROSS SOUNDING AS NUGGNUT. Christ.

2. Attention, Arby's. My office window overlooks one of you, so we have an uneasy truce of a co-existence. I have accepted this. What I cannot accept is your commercial where the guy has his wife dress up as an Arby's worker and carry in a tray of roast fucking beef as a way to sexify the ol' lovelife. I might have left this well enough alone, but then you have your logo sproing to life above his head in the most blatant bit of phallic symbolism I've seen on television since the last time I watched one of those Sunday morning fishing shows on ESPN. The hell?

3. You guys had one of the chicken biscuits from Wendy's? Chicken the size of your head. It's horrendously awful for you, but it soaks up a hangover quite well.